Rene: We don’t kill. Just if you’re wondering. 
Adrian: *darkly* Nathan would have murder as the answer to everything if we gave him the option. 
Rene: But we do neutralize threats; in the case of someone finding out about us, we either manipulate the situation so it seems like whoever stumbled across us was mistaken and can’t trust their memory, or get rid of the memory- and evidence- ourselves. This is one of the reasons bases move so much, and the general cleanup of safety risks is most of my responsibility. 
Adrian: That’s, uh, not really what they asked, though…
Rene: Miles has a florid recruitment speech that he parades out when the opportunity arises, but it boils down to this: the first purpose the Company was created was to help minimize the threats out in the world not under the influence of a story. When heroes aren’t around, rogue monsters and disorder don’t disappear. We do a lot of clean-up in NPC areas, and deal with the fallout that wasn’t taken care of in a story’s resolution. Narrative causality bends a lot for some characters, and that means that some of them can be very destructive. Our second purpose is to keep stories- and those inside of them- on the least destructive track. This means we have a lot of people undercover as NPCs or minor characters, pulling strings to make sure things go as they should. 
The third reason has to do with putting dangerous artifacts- and people- into better use than they might have otherwise gone. People who can see beyond the fourth wall and who would otherwise be deemed insane, those who enjoy the sensation of pulling the world’s strings, that kind of thing. 
Adrian: *coughhackMiles*Rene:  Though most of us are here because we’re very good at slipping under people’s radar. Those of us with unusual abilities usually aren’t strong enough- or have seemingly useless enough powers- to not get picked up by organized bodies of magic-users or to be taken seriously. That’s another reason why we gather artifacts- when fulfilling the first purpose of the company, we need things to defend ourselves with. There are many warehouses where collections of artifacts are stored. The Tabloid Town branch is one such location.Adrian: So here’s the obvious follow up: now you know. And you can either join us-Rene: Or I can make you forget. What’ll it be?  

Rene: We don’t kill. Just if you’re wondering. 

Adrian: *darkly* Nathan would have murder as the answer to everything if we gave him the option. 

Rene: But we do neutralize threats; in the case of someone finding out about us, we either manipulate the situation so it seems like whoever stumbled across us was mistaken and can’t trust their memory, or get rid of the memory- and evidence- ourselves. This is one of the reasons bases move so much, and the general cleanup of safety risks is most of my responsibility. 

Adrian: That’s, uh, not really what they asked, though…

Rene: Miles has a florid recruitment speech that he parades out when the opportunity arises, but it boils down to this: the first purpose the Company was created was to help minimize the threats out in the world not under the influence of a story. When heroes aren’t around, rogue monsters and disorder don’t disappear. We do a lot of clean-up in NPC areas, and deal with the fallout that wasn’t taken care of in a story’s resolution. 

Narrative causality bends a lot for some characters, and that means that some of them can be very destructive. Our second purpose is to keep stories- and those inside of them- on the least destructive track. This means we have a lot of people undercover as NPCs or minor characters, pulling strings to make sure things go as they should. 

The third reason has to do with putting dangerous artifacts- and people- into better use than they might have otherwise gone. People who can see beyond the fourth wall and who would otherwise be deemed insane, those who enjoy the sensation of pulling the world’s strings, that kind of thing. 

Adrian: *coughhackMiles*

Rene:  Though most of us are here because we’re very good at slipping under people’s radar. Those of us with unusual abilities usually aren’t strong enough- or have seemingly useless enough powers- to not get picked up by organized bodies of magic-users or to be taken seriously. That’s another reason why we gather artifacts- when fulfilling the first purpose of the company, we need things to defend ourselves with. There are many warehouses where collections of artifacts are stored. The Tabloid Town branch is one such location.

Adrian: So here’s the obvious follow up: now you know. And you can either join us-

Rene: Or I can make you forget. What’ll it be?